There's no argument
this
Father's Day
By
Jeffrey Fazio
DriveTime Columnist
Holidays
have different meanings for everyone and each family has their own
traditions for celebrating them. These precious days, so conspicuous
on our calendars, mark a time for families to come together, to share
and to love. For my family, it's also a time to argue.
It's
not as bad as that may have sounded. You see, it is probably more
appropriate to call it a post-dinner debate, not an argument. It's one
of the main events of the day. It's a source of sharing, not angst.
The
same topics have been disputed for years without a glimmer of hope of
a resolution. In fact, the longer they go on, the more entrenched each
side has become almost to the point of absurdity. At times, the actual
debating is seemingly more import ant than the specific topic being
discussed.
My
stepfather, Robert Simon, has argued about gun control with his
brother Jerry after holiday dinners forever (maybe longer). When they
tire of that subject, they find infinite possibilities within the
realm of politics to disagree on. There is no hatred in these
exchanges. This is, after all, just one of their ways of sharing their
brotherly love.
Throughout
these debates I generally sit on the sideline and play the role of a
sadistic referee, a devil's advocate of sorts. My real interest lies
in keeping the debate going by randomly switching sides and
interjecting humor whenever it is most inappropriate.
Okay,
it's the sixth paragraph of my DriveTime column and you are
probably starting to wonder, "Where's the car talk?" Well
here it comes.
My
stepfather and I have our own subject to debate -- cars. Although we
are both "car guys," we have significantly different
opinions on what makes a great car. Over the last 15 years, he has
presented some amazing points, while I have done my best to correct
them.
When
I was a teenager, these arguments first began with which was more
worthwhile: the power of a Ford Mustang or the handling of a Toyota
MR2. As I entered my 20s, these exchanges grew into which was a more
attractive car, the Eagle Talon or the Toyota MR2. I was certain that
him switching cars to debate me with while I stayed loyal to the MR2
was evidence that I was winning.
By
my mid-20s we were debating the merits of racing an all-wheel-drive
Talon in the rain versus rear-wheel-drive MR2 in the dry. Two years
ago I turned 30 and our quarrels have since been over which car, the
Talon or the MR2, has the greater power potential. This column will
finally lay all of these debates to rest.
There
will be no more arguing from me ... at least for the next 24
hours. I am ready to settle the debate and forfeit my stance ...
for today only. I hereby declare that Robert Simon's Eagle Talon
is more powerful than my Toyota MR2 ... in his mind. I fully
concede that if tested, it would out-brake and out-handle my car ...
I'm sure some part of it would brake and his hatchback offers an extra
handle. It probably goes without saying, but I will for
completeness sake, that his pride-and-joy is also infinitely more
attractive than mine ... through his eyes and that's all that
matters. In short, his Talon is far superior in every respect to
my MR2 ... I can't believe I actually typed that.
Happy
Father's Day, Pop.
|